The broad told me that she had lots of dough, so much, that she could open a bakery for the Chinese Army. She then told me that her husband was connected and that the cops wouldn’t help her. I said, “So, what am I supposed to do, rub this guy out?” Sheepishly, the lady said: “Well…whatever you think…and I’ll pay you a lot, and then some, once the job is done.” I didn’t believe her cock and bull story about the money; but her line: “and then some”, intrigued me.
So, I had some friends meet the husband in a bar. Yeah, we could’ve fit him for a cement kimono, but that’s not my style. So, my buddies just roughed him up; they were all over him like a cheap suit. They slipped him a mickey and the next thing he knew, he was on a freighter, bound for…who knows? I didn’t ask.
So, I called the dame and there was no answer. I could’ve guessed she’d skip town. I strolled to my walk-up on Eighth Avenue. I walked in; the place was so quiet, it made the morgue seem like Joe’s Bar. I turned on the lights and there she was, wearing nothing but her birthday suit, lying on a pile of thousand dollar bills that would fill Hoover Dam. After we rolled around in the dough, she grabbed a handful of bills, threw them in the air and let them rain down.
Turned out, the husband had quite a stash and it was a good day after all.
I wrote this for the Week 71 Trifecta Writing Challenge where we are supposed to write a 33-333 word composition using the Urban Dictionary definition of "rain" in the context of bills coming down on someone.
I was inspired to write a Noir-like piece after having read many idioms in last week's Trifextra Writing Challenge and having also played a #hashtag called #failednoir on Twitter.
Your comments are appreciated.